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Don’t dry your hands with the bidet towels

Don’t get me wrong, these European junkets are pretty good. I’ve spent the past couple of days hanging out with David Millar, who is a really cool guy. He even bought me coffee at a bar the other day. But it’s not all rainbows and sunshine over here.

Due to the job Tim and I have, internet connection is a necessary requirement. I looked up the hotel I’m staying at and it claimed to have internet access. It did, however, it was crappy hotel pay-to-use computers with European keyboards. I hate Euro keyboards! Finding the @ symbol is slow and then you have to use the “alt grammar key” to use it. My room at the hotel is rather Spartan. In classic European style, the bed is a little over six feet in length, which means my 6’2” frame leaves my toes barely dangling over the edge. Then from the edge of the bed to the wall is about a meter. Then there are the paper thin walls. I got the idea for this post as I listened to my neighbor’s grunting and groaning, which I am assuming is of a sexual nature or he is moving furniture. Either way it woke me and I came up with this idea for the post. Another classic Euro feature is the bidet. I have yet to figure out the mechanics of using a bidet. Do you squat over it? Do you fill it up and dunk yourself in it? And why are there towels hanging up next to it? All I know is I’m not touching those things with a ten-foot pole! I’ve gotten several emails from people telling me that I must be eating well. My diet has been the cafeteria food that the hotel serves up every night. The chef must be in a slump, because the selection has not deviated one bit these past few days. Breakfast: Scrambled eggs, sausage, toast, beans, pasta. Dinner: Pasta, rice, fried pastry item of unknown origin. The only slight culinary change has been dessert. It changes from vanilla and chocolate ice cream to Italian gelato. I left the States at 177 pounds, I’ll return about five pounds heavier.

In classic Neil style I’m wearing all free clothing

That all said this trip has been great so far. My first interview with Millar in early ’06 was stiff as he was a bit reticent talking to me. This time it couldn’t have gone better. We hung out the days prior to the interview and just chatted. I also showed him the issue which his first interview appeared in and he loved it. I told him that I wanted to interview him for no more than ten minutes but we ended up talking for over 20 minutes with all of it being good stuff. I guess I’ll be doing some transcribing on the flight home.

Later today we are riding to the top of a small mountain and watch the racers pass. And for those who asked, the Scott Addict is a climbing machine!

4 Responses to “Don’t dry your hands with the bidet towels”

  1. SLOVER February 13, 2007 at 12:51 am #

    Thanks for the update!!!

  2. Jason Schifo February 13, 2007 at 8:43 am #

    Again Neil we – well at least me is begging for a small Iban Mayo interview. Have a heart and remember that he was one of the select few who put the scare into Armstrong during his seven-string of wins.
    Also is it just me or has S/D taken you in and made you their unofficial 5th Beatle ?? Free clothes….a spanking cool Scott bike….Man and I get excited when I find a dollar bill in a jacket pocket or someone hooks me up with the rare package of pop-tarts.
    Looking forward to the next issue – BTW Sarah Hammer is super cool cover girl material with her “I can kick your ass any day on the bike” stare down. Keep it going!

  3. blue squirrel February 13, 2007 at 7:27 pm #

    yea, i second that, iban mayo interview. maybe if you talk with him, something will click inside of him and he will come out of his downward spiral of late and than we can all say, yeah.. it was neil… [that turned iban’s career around]

  4. Chris February 14, 2007 at 7:36 pm #

    There is a Mayo interview in Velo News.

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